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You can no more win a war than you can win an earthquake.

Bach J.S.


It was the next morning that the armies of Twodor marched east laden with long lances, sharp swords, and death-dealing hangovers. The thousands were led by Arrowroot, who sat limply in his sidesaddle, nursing a whopper. Goodgulf, Gimlet, and the r

Burroughs William S.


In "King Henry VI, Part II," Shakespeare has Dick Butcher suggest to his fellow anti-establishment rabble-rousers, "The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers." That action may be extreme but a similar sentiment was expressed by Thomas K. Co

Eliot T.S.


Why is it that we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved.

Eliot T.S.


Pity the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.

Eliot T.S.


The sunlights differ, but there is only one darkness.

Gilbert W.S.


Why does a hearse horse snicker, hauling a lawyer away?

Harper Lucille S.


A place for everything and everything in its place.

Hayakawa S.I.


It seems to me that nearly every woman I know wants a man who knows how to love with authority. Women are simple souls who like simple things, and one of the simplest is one of the simplest to give. ... Our family airedale will come clear across t

Hunter S. Thompson


The Law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich, as well as the poor, to sleep under the bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.

Johnson S.


I stick my neck out for nobody.

Kaufman George S.


I knew her before she was a virgin.

Kierkegaard S.


Plots are like girdles. Hidden, they hold your interest; revealed, they're of no interest except to fetishists. Like girdles, they attempt to contain an uncontainable experience.

Knapp R.S.


A good scapegoat is hard to find. A guilty conscience is the mother of invention.

Koblas G.S.


Never keep up with the Joneses. Drag them down to your level.

Krabill W.S.


"I have to convince you, or at least snow you ..."

Lewis C.S.


Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.

Lewis C.S.


The best you get is an even break.

Maugham W.S.


It is Mr. Mellon's credo that $200,000,000 can do no wrong. Our offense consists in doubting it.

Perelman S.J.


It is imperative when flying coach that you restrain any tendency toward the vividly imaginative. For although it may momentarily appear to be the case, it is not at all likely that the cabin is entirely inhabited by crying babies smoking inexpensiv

S. Paige


Better late than never.

Surtees R.S.


If we could sell our experiences for what they cost us, we would all be millionaires.

T.S. Eliot


I know on which side my bread is buttered.

Thompson Dr. Hunter S.


All this wheeling and dealing around, why, it isn't for money, it's for fun. Money's just the way we keep score.

Thompson Dr. Hunter S.


Comparing information and knowledge is like asking whether the fatness of a pig is more or less green than the designated hitter rule."

Thompson H.S.


Some performers on television appear to be horrible people, but when you finally get to know them in person, they turn out to be even worse.

Thompson Hunter S.


The 'A' is for content, the 'minus' is for not typing it. Don't ever do this to my eyes again.

Thompson Hunter S.


If a man stay away from his wife for seven years, the law presumes the separation to have killed him; yet according to our daily experience, it might well prolong his life.

Truman Harry S.


The more I want to get something done, the less I call it work.

Truman Harry S.


Art is a jealous mistress.

Truman Harry S.


Long were the days of pain I have spent within its walls, and long were the nights of aloneness; and who can depart from his pain and his aloneness without regret?

Truman Harry S.


Living in LA is like not having a date on Saturday night.

Truman President Harry S.


We can embody the truth, but we cannot know it.

William S. Paley


I have defined the hundred per cent American as ninety-nine per cent an idiot.

regulations. check your security





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When I first arrived in this country I had only fifteen cents in my pocket and a willingness to compromise.
caption Weber cartoon

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S. Paige
 
 
 
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