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Tempt not a desperate man.

Ba Dave


If a man stay away from his wife for seven years, the law presumes the separation to have killed him; yet according to our daily experience, it might well prolong his life.

Barry Dave


L'hazard ne favorise que l'esprit prepare.

Barry Dave


It's not so hard to lift yourself by your bootstraps once you're off the ground.

Barry Dave


Any stone in your boot always migrates against the pressure gradient to exactly the point of most pressure.

Barry Dave


An Englishman never enjoys himself, except for a noble purpose.

Barry Dave


It's not enough to be Hungarian; you must have talent too.

Barry Dave


Whoever has lived long enough to find out what life is, knows how deep a debt of gratitude we owe to Adam, the first great benefactor of our race. He brought death into the world.

Barry Dave


Non-Determinism is not meant to be reasonable.

Barry Dave


That's no moon...

Barry Dave


How do you explain school to a higher intelligence?

Barry Dave


I love treason but hate a traitor.

Barry Dave


The major sin is the sin of being born.

Barry Dave


Prisons are built with stones of Law, brothels with bricks of Religion.

Barry Dave


Good government never depends upon laws, but upon the personal qualities of those who govern. The machinery of government is always subordinate to the will of those who administer that machinery. The most important element of government, therefore,

Barry Dave


The human race is a race of cowards; and I am not only marching in that procession but carrying a banner.

Barry Dave


No one born with a mouth and a need is "innocent".

Barry Dave


We were young and our happiness dazzled us with its strength. But there was also a terrible betrayal that lay within me like a Merle Haggard song at a French restaurant. [...] I could not tell the girl about the woman of the tollway, of her milk w

Barry Dave


If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars.

Barry Dave


Receiving a million dollars tax free will make you feel better than being flat broke and having a stomach ache.

Barry Dave


War is like love, it always finds a way.

Barry Dave


A continuing flow of paper is sufficient to continue the flow of paper.

Barry Dave


If you sell diamonds, you cannot expect to have many customers. But a diamond is a diamond even if there are no customers.

Barry Dave


We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong patriotic duty not to go to jail.

Barry Dave


No live organism can continue for long to exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality; even larks and katydids are supposed, by some, to dream. Hill House, not sane, stood by itself against its hills, holding darkness within; it had stood so fo

Barry Dave


"Given the choice between accomplishing something and just lying around, I'd rather lie around. No contest."

Barry Dave


(1) Avoid fried meats which angry up the blood. (2) If your stomach antagonizes you, pacify it with cool thoughts. (3) Keep the juices flowing by jangling around gently as you move. (4) Go very lightly on the vices, such as carrying on in society, as

Barry Dave


A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back the when it begins to rain.

Barry Dave


The life which is unexamined is not worth living.

Barry Dave


Public use of any portable music system is a virtually guaranteed indicator of sociopathic tendencies.

Barry Dave


What we need in this country, instead of Daylight Savings Time, which nobody really understands anyway, is a new concept called Weekday Morning Time, whereby at 7 a.m. every weekday we go into a space-launch-style "hold" for two to three hours, durin

Barry Dave


God is really only another artist. He invented the giraffe, the elephant and the cat. He has no real style, He just goes on trying other things.

Barry Dave


One good turn deserves another.

Barry Dave


I'd be a poorer man if I'd never seen an eagle fly.

Barry Dave


Lo! Men have become the tool of their tools.

Barry Dave


The chief enemy of creativity is "good" sense

Barry Dave


"There was an interesting development in the CBS-Westmoreland trial: both sides agreed that after the trial, Andy Rooney would be allowed to talk to the jury for three minutes about little things that annoyed him during the trial."

Barry Dave


A myth is a religion in which no-one any longer believes.

Barry Dave


Would it help if I got out and pushed?

Barry Dave


Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent.

Barry Dave


I always had a repulsive need to be something more than human.

Barry Dave


Don't tell me how hard you work. Tell me how much you get done.

Barry Dave


The cart has no place where a fifth wheel could be used.

Barry Dave


I am a deeply superficial person.

Barry Dave


One learns to itch where one can scratch.

Barry Dave


With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law; and every time they make a law it's a joke.

Barry Dave


A yawn is a silent shout.

Barry Dave


With her body, woman is more sincere than man; but with her mind she lies. And when she lies, she does not believe herself.

Barry Dave


Fear is the greatest salesman.

Barry Dave


Someday, Weederman, we'll look back on all this and laugh... It will probably be one of those deep, eerie ones that slowly builds to a blood-curdling maniacal scream... but still it will be a laugh.

Barry Dave


October 12, the Discovery. It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss it.

Dave Barry





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It is the wisdom of crocodiles, that shed tears when they would devour.
Bacon Francis

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
Ba Dave
 
 
 
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