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The intelligence of any discussion diminishes with the square of the number of participants.

Ambrose Bierce


All Gods were immortal.

Ambrose Bierce


Steady movement is more important than speed, much of the time. So long as there is a regular progression of stimuli to get your mental hooks into, there is room for lateral movement. Once this begins, its rate is a matter of discretion.

Ambrose Bierce


If Jesus Christ were to come today, people would not even crucify him. They would ask him to dinner, and hear what he had to say, and make fun of it.

Ambrose Bierce


Even if you do learn to speak correct English, whom are you going to speak it to?

Ambrose Bierce


Some scholars are like donkeys, they merely carry a lot of books.

Ambrose Bierce


It has long been noticed that juries are pitiless for robbery and full of indulgence for infanticide. A question of interest, my dear Sir! The jury is afraid of being robbed and has passed the age when it could be a victim of infanticide.

Bierce Ambrose


A likely impossibility is always preferable to an unconvincing possibility.

Bierce Ambrose


Standards are different for all things, so the standard set by man is by no means the only 'certain' standard. If you mistake what is relative for something certain, you have strayed far from the ultimate truth.

Bierce Ambrose


The Worst Car Hire Service When David Schwartz left university in 1972, he set up Rent-a-wreck as a joke. Being a natural prankster, he acquired a fleet of beat-up shabby, wreckages waiting for the scrap heap in California. He put on a cap and lo

Bierce Ambrose


When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

Bierce Ambrose


A man gazing at the stars is proverbially at the mercy of the puddles in the road.

Bierce Ambrose


When alerted to an intrusion by tinkling glass or otherwise, 1) Calm yourself 2) Identify the intruder 3) If hostile, kill him. Step number 3 is of particular importance. If you leave the guy alive out of misguided softheartedness, he will repay y

Bierce Ambrose


A man who cannot seduce men cannot save them either.

Bierce Ambrose


The older I grow, the less important the comma becomes. Let the reader catch his own breath.

Bierce Ambrose


The mosquito is the state bird of New Jersey.

Bierce Ambrose





Random Quote


Eeyore, the old grey Donkey, stood by the side of the stream, and looked at himself in the water. "Pathetic," he said. "That's what it is. Pathetic." He turned and walked slowly down the stream for twenty yards, splashed across it, and walked s
Milne

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Bierce Ambrose
 
 
 
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