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Dustin Farnum: Why, yesterday, I had the audience glued to their seats! Oliver Herford: Wonderful! Wonderful! Clever of you to think of it!

Abrams Gen. C.

Seize the day, put no trust in the morrow!

Attorney General William

It is better to live rich than to die rich.

Bergen Candice

There are two ways of disliking art. One is to dislike it. The other is to like it rationally.

Bradley General Omar N.

Sho' they got to have it against the law. Shoot, ever'body git high, they wouldn't be nobody git up and feed the chickens. Hee-hee.

Cynic Diogenes the

If you only have a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail.


If reporters don't know that truth is plural, they ought to be lawyers.

Fowler Gene

You can always pick up your needle and move to another groove.

G Gen.

All this wheeling and dealing around, why, it isn't for money, it's for fun. Money's just the way we keep score.

Gallagher Eugene P.

The longest part of the journey is said to be the passing of the gate.

Gavin General James

A fake fortuneteller can be tolerated. But an authentic soothsayer should be shot on sight. Cassandra did not get half the kicking around she deserved.

Gene Kirkwood

Please try to limit the amount of "this room doesn't have any bazingas" until you are told that those rooms are "punched out." Once punched out, we have a right to complain about atrocities, missing bazingas, and such.

Genter Quentin

You or I must yield up his life to Ahrimanes. I would rather it were you. I should have no hesitation in sacrificing my own life to spare yours, but we take stock next week, and it would not be fair on the company.

Hagen Walter

There are three infallible ways of pleasing an author, and the three form a rising scale of compliment: 1, to tell him you have read one of his books; 2, to tell him you have read all of his books; 3, to ask him to let you read the manuscript of his

Ionesco Eugene

There's no justice in this world.

Ionesco Eugene

Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes, and not rather a new wearer of clothes.

Ionesco Eugene

If the colleges were better, if they really had it, you would need to get the police at the gates to keep order in the inrushing multitude. See in college how we thwart the natural love of learning by leaving the natural method of teaching what each

McCarthy Eugene

It's not so hard to lift yourself by your bootstraps once you're off the ground.

McCarthy Eugene

I have the simplest tastes. I am always satisfied with the best.

Mitchell Gener

Do not use that foreign word "ideals". We have that excellent native word "lies".

Scott Gene

By perseverance the snail reached the Ark.


The first requisite for immortality is death.


There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?


The only cultural advantage LA has over NY is that you can make a right turn on a red light.


The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.

Wolfe Gene

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America, I'm putting my queer shoulder to the wheel.
Ginsberg Allen

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
G Gen
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