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A new taste had been acquired and a new appetite began to grow. The time had long since arrived to crush the technical intelligentsia, which had come to regard itself as too irreplaceable and had not gotten used to catching instructions on the wing.

Englan Mark Twain on New


Dignity is like a flag. It flaps in a storm.

Li Mark Twain


The control of the production of wealth is the control of human life itself.

Mark Twain


There's nothing worse for your business than extra Santa Clauses smoking in the men's room.

Mark Twain


If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you.

Mark Twain


A continuing flow of paper is sufficient to continue the flow of paper.

Mark Twain


If Beethoven's Seventh Symphony is not by some means abridged, it will soon fall into disuse.

Mark Twain


Your chances of getting hit by lightning go up if you stand under a tree, shake your fist at the sky, and say, "Storms suck!"

Mark Twain


The Puritan hated bear-baiting, not because it gave pain to the bear, but because it gave pleasure to the spectators.

Mark Twain


Any president should have the right to shoot at least two people a year without explanation.

Mark Twain


The notes blatted skyward as they rose over the Canada geese, feathered rumps mooning the day, webbed appendages frantically pedaling unseen bicycles in their search for sustenance, driven by cruel Nature's maxim, 'Ya wanna eat, ya gotta work,' and a

Mark Twain


A beginning is the time for taking the most delicate care that balances are correct.

Mark Twain


Politics and the fate of mankind are formed by men without ideals and without greatness. Those who have greatness within them do not go in for politics.

Twain Mark


We are giving instruction to FBI agents in the various Chinese dialects ... to handle present and likely future contingencies.

Twain Mark


American cars are made shoddily... Cars made overseas are far superior.

Twain Mark


Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding.

Twain Mark


He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.

Twain Mark


God helps them that help themselves.

Twain Mark


Sherry [Thomas Sheridan] is dull, naturally dull; but it must have taken him a great deal of pains to become what we now see him. Such an excess of stupidity, sir, is not in Nature.

Twain Mark


In the plot, people came to the land; the land loved them; they worked and struggled and had lots of children. There was a Frenchman who talked funny and a greenhorn from England who was a fancy-pants but when it came to the crunch he was all courag

Twain Mark


If I had any humility I would be perfect.

Twain Mark


Live within your income, even if you have to borrow to do so.

Twain Mark


An efficient and a successful administration manifests itself equally in small as in great matters.

Twain Mark


I'd be a poorer man if I'd never seen an eagle fly.

Twain Mark


Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.

Twain Mark


I hold it, that a little rebellion, now and then, is a good thing...

Twain Mark


Before you ask more questions, think about whether you really want to know the answers.

Twain Mark


Lookie, lookie, here comes cookie...

Twain Mark


The Priest's grey nimbus in a niche where he dressed discreetly. I will not sleep here tonight. Home also I cannot go. A voice, sweetened and sustained, called to him from the sea. Turning the curve he waved his hand. A sleek brown head, a seal's,

Twain Mark


The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.

Twain Mark


The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just terrible.

Twain Mark


New York now leads the world's great cities in the number of people around whom you shouldn't make a sudden move.

Twain Mark


History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree on.

Twain Mark


A good name lost is seldom regained. When character is gone, all is gone, and one of the richest jewels of life is lost forever.

Twain Mark


If two men agree on everything, you may be sure that one of them is doing the thinking.

Twain Mark


If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.

Twain Mark


The more I see of men the more I admire dogs.

Twain Mark


I used to be a rebel in my youth. This cause... that cause... (chuckle) I backed 'em ALL! But I learned. Rebellion is simply a device used by the immature to hide from his own problems. So I lost interest in politics. Now when I feel aroused by

Twain Mark


It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end.

Twain Mark


America has been discovered before, but it has always been hushed up.

Twain Mark


Work is of two kinds: first, altering the position of matter at or near the earth's surface relative to other matter; second, telling other people to do so.

Twain Mark


All things that are, are with more spirit chased than enjoyed.

Twain Mark


It's very glamorous to raise millions of dollars, until it's time for the venture capitalist to suck your eyeballs out.

Twain Mark


The lawgiver, of all beings, most owes the law allegiance. He of all men should behave as though the law compelled him. But it is the universal weakness of mankind that what we are given to administer we presently imagine we own.

Twain Mark


My father was a saint, I'm not.

Twain Mark


The individual choice of garnishment of a burger can be an important point to the consumer in this day when individualism is an increasingly important thing to people.

Twain Mark


The hatred of relatives is the most violent.

Twain Mark


"Acceptance without proof is the fundamental characteristic of Western religion, Rejection without proof is the fundamental characteristic of Western science."

Twain Mark


A diplomat is a person who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.

Twain Mark


The sky is blue so we know where to stop mowing.

Twain Mark


When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to

Twain Mark


Has the great art and mystery of politics no apparent utility? Does it appear to be unqualifiedly ratty, raffish, sordid, obscene and low down, and its salient virtuosi a gang of umitigated scoundrels? Then let us not forget its high capacity to soo

Twain Mark


I use not only all the brains I have, but all those I can borrow as well.

Twain Mark


A myth is a religion in which no-one any longer believes.

Twain Mark


Learning French is trivial: the word for horse is cheval, and everything else follows in the same way.

Twain Mark


Anyone who has had a bull by the tail knows five or six more things than someone who hasn't.

Twain Mark


The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.

Twain Mark


The most common given name in the world is Mohammad; the most common family name in the world is Chang. Can you imagine the enormous number of people in the world named Mohammad Chang?

Twain Mark


Let him choose out of my files, his projects to accomplish.

Twain Mark


It's easier to be a liberal a long way from home.

Twain Mark


Who does not trust enough will not be trusted.

Twain Mark


He who attacks the fundamentals of the American broadcasting industry attacks democracy itself.

Twain Mark


The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months in jail; if it were not for this penalty, the jury would never hear the evidence.

Twain Mark


One thing I have no worry about is whether God exists. But it has occurred to me that God has Alzheimer's and has forgotten we exist.

Twain Mark


There's no such thing as a free lunch.

Twain Mark


Thompson, if he is to be believed, has sampled the entire rainbow of legal and illegal drugs in heroic efforts to feel better than he does. As for the truth about his health: I have asked around about it. I am told that he appears to be strong and

Twain Mark


People who develop the habit of thinking of themselves as world citizens are fulfilling the first requirement of sanity in our time.

Twain Mark


The adjuration to be "normal" seems shockingly repellent to me; I see neither hope nor comfort in sinking to that low level. I think it is ignorance that makes people think of abnormality only with horror and allows them to remain undismayed at the

Twain Mark


The majority of the stupid is invincible and guaranteed for all time. The terror of their tyranny, however, is alleviated by their lack of consistency.

Twain Mark


Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.

Twain Mark


All generalizations are false, including this one.

Twain Mark


I do not believe in the creed professed by the Jewish Church, by the Roman Church, by the Greek Church, by the Turkish Church, by the Protestant Church, nor by any Church that I know of. My own mind is my own Church.

Twain Mark


The only problem with seeing too much is that it makes you insane.

Twain Mark


The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of misery.

Twain Mark


Yesterday I was a dog. Today I'm a dog. Tomorrow I'll probably still be a dog. Sigh! There's so little hope for advancement.

Twain Mark


Civilization and profits go hand in hand.

Twain Mark


Small is beautiful.

Twain Mark


A sequel is an admission that you've been reduced to imitating yourself.

Twain Mark


Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that nothing that is worth knowing can be taught.

Twain Mark


[The French Riviera is] a sunny place for shady people.

Twain Mark


To lead people, you must follow behind.

Twain Mark


Sometimes, too long is too long.

Twain Mark


Men are superior to women.

Twain Mark


It is not enough that I should succeed. Others must fail.

Twain Mark


Prediction is very difficult, especially of the future.

Twain Mark


You have all eternity to be cautious in when you're dead.

Twain Mark


Set the cart before the horse.

Twain Mark


of our air pollution stems from hydrocarbons released by vegetation, so let's not go overboard in setting and enforcing tough emissions standards from man-made sources."

Twain Mark


In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Twain Mark


A real diplomat is one who can cut his neighbor's throat without having his neighbour notice it.

Twain Mark


There but for the grace of God, goes God.

Twain Mark


When a fellow says, "It ain't the money but the principle of the thing," it's the money.

Twain Mark


No Marxist can deny that the interests of socialism are higher than the interests of the right of nations to self-determination.

Twain Mark


[Nuclear war] ... may not be desirable.

Twain Mark


If a man stay away from his wife for seven years, the law presumes the separation to have killed him; yet according to our daily experience, it might well prolong his life.

Twain Mark





Random Quote


Mr. Salter's side of the conversation was limited to expressions of assent. When Lord Copper was right he said "Definitely, Lord Copper"; when he was wrong, "Up to a point." "Let me see, what's the name of the place I mean? Capital of Japan? Yokoh
Wau Evelyn

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
Mark Twain
 
 
 
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