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There is more to life than increasing its speed.

Shakespeare


Under any conditions, anywhere, whatever you are doing, there is some ordinance under which you can be booked.

Shakespeare


It is a sobering thought that when Mozart was my age, he had been dead for two years.

Shakespeare


I see where we are starting to pay some attention to our neigbors to the south. We could never understand why Mexico wasn't just crazy about us; for we have always had their good will, and oil and minerals, at heart.

Shakespeare


If a thing's worth having, it's worth cheating for.

Shakespeare


The final delusion is the belief that one has lost all delusions.

Shakespeare


"Give me enough medals, and I'll win any war."

Shakespeare William


If they were so inclined, they could impeach him because they don't like his necktie.

Shakespeare Wm.


A violent man will die a violent death.

Shakespeare Wm.


Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. By Order of the Author

Shakespeare


The shifts of Fortune test the reliability of friends.

Shakespeare


Nice guys finish last.

Shakespeare


A man's house is his castle.

Shakespeare


One of my favorite jokes, a telling commentary on Jewish mothers' capacity to lay on guilt, involves the mother who gave her son two neckties on Chanuka. The boy hurried into his bedroom, ripped off the tie he was wearing, put on one of the ties his

Shakespeare


You guys have been practicing discrimination for years. Now it's our turn.

Shakespeare


There's such a thing as too much point on a pencil.

Shakespeare


Haste makes waste.

Shakespeare


Tip the world over on its side and everything loose will land in Los Angeles.

Shakespeare


The problem that we thought was a problem was, indeed, a problem, but not the problem we thought was the problem.

Shakespeare


When in doubt, do it. It's much easier to apologize than to get permission.

Shakespeare


Bingo, gas station, hamburger with a side order of airplane noise, and you'll be Gary, Indiana.

Shakespeare


There's no such thing as an original sin.

Shakespeare


The Law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich, as well as the poor, to sleep under the bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.

Shakespeare


I have already given two cousins to the war and I stand ready to sacrifice my wife's brother.

Shakespeare William


Rembrandt is not to be compared in the painting of character with our extraordinarily gifted English artist, Mr. Rippingille.

Shakespeare William


I hate dying.

Shakespeare William


The government [is] extremely fond of amassing great quantities of statistics. These are raised to the nth degree, the cube roots are extracted, and the results are arranged into elaborate and impressive displays. What must be kept ever in mind, how

Shakespeare William


There must be more to life than having everything.

Shakespeare William


The first Rotarian was the first man to call John the Baptist "Jack."

Shakespeare William


The intelligence of any discussion diminishes with the square of the number of participants.

Shakespeare William


That government is best which governs least.

Shakespeare William


"Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under Communism, it's just the opposite."

Shakespeare William


It is sweet to let the mind unbend on occasion.

Shakespeare William


Likewise, the national appetizer, brine-cured herring with raw onions, wins few friends, Germans excepted.

Shakespeare William


For fools rush in where angels fear to tread.

Shakespeare William


Politics, like religion, hold up the torches of matrydom to the reformers of error.

Shakespeare William


Every person, all the events in your life are there because you have drawn them there. What you choose to do with them is up to you.

Shakespeare William


It is a wise father that knows his own child.

Shakespeare William


Nothing is illegal if one hundred businessmen decide to do it.

Shakespeare William


We have lingered long enough on the shores of the Cosmic Ocean.

Shakespeare William


May you live in uninteresting times.

Shakespeare Wm.


If clear thinking created sparks, we could safely store dynamite in James Watt's office.

William Shakespeare


Nobody knows what goes between his cold toes and his warm ears.

William Shakespeare


The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just terrible.

William Shakespeare


Age before beauty; and pearls before swine.

William Shakespeare


I have seen the future and it is just like the present, only longer.

William Shakespeare





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I respect faith, but doubt is what gives you an education.
Mizner Wilson

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
Shakespeare
 
 
 
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