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It's always darkest just before the lights go out.

Oscar Wilde


In case of fire, stand in the hall and shout "Fire!"

Oscar Wilde


Eggheads unite! You have nothing to lose but your yolks.

Wilde Oscar


A hundred years from now it is very likely that [of Twain's works] "The Jumping Frog" alone will be remembered.

Wilde Oscar


Crito, I owe a cock to Asclepius; will you remember to pay the debt?

Wilde Oscar


When I was in school, I cheated on my metaphysics exam: I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.

Wilde Oscar


May you live in uninteresting times.

Wilde Oscar


"I am not sure what this is, but an `F' would only dignify it."

Wilde Oscar


To lead people, you must follow behind.

Wilde Oscar


"Well," Brahma said, "even after ten thousand explanations, a fool is no wiser, but an intelligent man requires only two thousand five hundred."

Wilde Oscar


XXI: It's easy to get a loan unless you need it. XXII: If stock market experts were so expert, they would be buying stock, not selling advice. XXIII: Any task can be completed in only one-third more time than is currently estimated. XXIV:

Wilde Oscar


I do not patronize poor, ill educated, or disenfranchised people by exempting them from the same critical examination I feel free to direct toward the rest of society, however much I might champion the same minority or disadvantaged group in the foru

Wilde Oscar


Term, holidays, term, holidays, till we leave school, and then work, work, work till we die.

Wilde Oscar


Gratitude and treachery are merely the two extremities of the same procession. You have seen all of it that is worth staying for when the band and the gaudy officials have gone by.

Wilde Oscar


You climb to reach the summit, but once there, discover that all roads lead down.

Wilde Oscar


The final delusion is the belief that one has lost all delusions.

Wilde Oscar


'Scuse me, while I kiss the sky!

Wilde Oscar


A priest asked: What is Fate, Master? And the Master answered: It is that which gives a beast of burden its reason for existence. It is that which men in former times had to bear upon their backs. It is that which has caused nations to build bywa

Wilde Oscar


Execute every act of thy life as though it were thy last.

Wilde Oscar


Academic politics is the most vicious and bitter form of politics, because the stakes are so low.

Wilde Oscar


A morgue is a morgue is a morgue. They can paint the walls with aggressively cheerful primary colors and splashy bold graphics, but it's still a holding place for the dead until they can be parted out to organ banks. Not that I would have cared nor

Wilde Oscar


Awash with unfocused desire, Everett twisted the lobe of his one remaining ear and felt the presence of somebody else behind him, which caused terror to push through his nervous system like a flash flood roaring down the mid-fork of the Feather River

Wilde Oscar


"There is no Father Christmas. It's just a marketing ploy to make low income parents' lives a misery." "... I want you to picture the trusting face of a child, streaked with tears because of what you just said." "I want you to picture the face of

Wilde Oscar


Woman is generally so bad that the difference between a good and a bad woman scarcely exists.

Wilde Oscar


When a shepherd goes to kill a wolf, and takes his dog along to see the sport, he should take care to avoid mistakes. The dog has certain relationships to the wolf the shepherd may have forgotten.

Wilde Oscar


"Jesus saves...but Gretzky gets the rebound!"

Wilde Oscar


A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.

Wilde Oscar


Whenever anyone says, "theoretically," they really mean, "not really."

Wilde Oscar


Money can't buy love, but it improves your bargaining position.

Wilde Oscar


If I had a plantation in Georgia and a home in Hell, I'd sell the plantation and go home.

Wilde Oscar


University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.

Wilde Oscar


The Angels want to wear my red shoes.

Wilde Oscar


We rarely find anyone who can say he has lived a happy life, and who, content with his life, can retire from the world like a satisfied guest.

Wilde Oscar


Time is but the stream I go a-fishing in.

Wilde Oscar


A writer is congenitally unable to tell the truth and that is why we call what he writes fiction.

Wilde Oscar


Laws are like sausages. It's better not to see them being made.

Wilde Oscar


Things are not always what they seem.

Wilde Oscar


Of all possible committee reactions to any given agenda item, the reaction that will occur is the one which will liberate the greatest amount of hot air.

Wilde Oscar


A critic is a bundle of biases held loosely together by a sense of taste.

Wilde Oscar





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Old age is the most unexpected of things that can happen to a man.
Trotsky

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
Wilde Oscar
 
 
 
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