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Theology is an attempt to explain a subject by men who do not understand it. The intent is not to tell the truth but to satisfy the questioner.

D Vine

Another possible source of guidance for teenagers is television, but television's message has always been that the need for truth, wisdom and world peace pales by comparison with the need for a toothpaste that offers whiter teeth *___and* fresher

D'Hericault Charles

Any stone in your boot always migrates against the pressure gradient to exactly the point of most pressure.

Dada Idi Amin

People of privilege will always risk their complete destruction rather than surrender any material part of their advantage.

Dada Idi Amin

Education and religion are two things not regulated by supply and demand. The less of either the people have, the less they want.

Dagny Taggart

If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars.

Daley Mayor

For a light heart lives long.

Daley Mayor

When one burns one's bridges, what a very nice fire it makes.

Daley Richard

To know Edina is to reject it.

Dali Salvador

Mother is far too clever to understand anything she does not like.

Dam Andries van

"She said, `I know you ... you cannot sing'. I said, `That's nothing, you should hear me play piano.'"

Dane Franklin K.

It's not a sin not to be Irish, but it is a great shame.

Dangerfield Rodney

Historians have now definitely established that Juan Cabrillo, discoverer of California, was not looking for Kansas, thus setting a precedent that continues to this day.

Danton G.J.

If I had a plantation in Georgia and a home in Hell, I'd sell the plantation and go home.

Darling Charles

All religions issue Bibles against Satan, and say the most injurious things against him, but we never hear his side.

Darrow Clarence

Take what you can use and let the rest go by.

Darrow Clarence

With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law; and every time they make a law it's a joke.

Darrow Clarence

Termiter's argument that God is His own grandmother generated a surprising amount of controversy among Church leaders, who on the one hand considered the argument unsupported by scripture but on the other hand were unwilling to risk offending God's g

Darrow Clarence

Progress was all right. Only it went on too long.

Darrow Clarence

I shot an arrow in to the air, and it stuck.

Darrow Clarence

To think contrary to one's era is heroism. But to speak against it is madness.

Darwin Charles

Try not to have a good time ... This is supposed to be educational.

Darwin Porter

When I saw a sign on the freeway that said, "Los Angeles 445 miles," I said to myself, "I've got to get out of this lane."

Dass Baba Ram

There's nothing in the middle of the road but yellow stripes and dead armadillos.

Dass Baba Ram

When a fellow says, "It ain't the money but the principle of the thing," it's the money.


"I understand this is your first dead client," Sabian was saying. The absurdity of the statement made me want to laugh but they don't call me Deadpan Allie and lie.

Dave Barry

There are three reasons for becoming a writer: the first is that you need the money; the second that you have something to say that you think the world should know; the third is that you can't think what to do with the long winter evenings.

David Bodanis

If men are not afraid to die, it is of no avail to threaten them with death. If men live in constant fear of dying, And if breaking the law means a man will be killed, Who will dare to break the law? There is always an official executioner. If

David Niven

Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines.

Davis Evan

Beauty is one of the rare things which does not lead to doubt of God.

Davis Evan

The price one pays for pursuing any profession, or calling, is an intimate knowledge of its ugly side.

Davis Miles

"Why are we importing all these highbrow plays like `Amadeus'? I could have told you Mozart was a jerk for nothing."

Davisson Richard

If a man stay away from his wife for seven years, the law presumes the separation to have killed him; yet according to our daily experience, it might well prolong his life.

Day Clarence

Tertullian was born in Carthage somewhere about 160 A.D. He was a pagan, and he abandoned himself to the lascivious life of his city until about his 35th year, when he became a Christian. [...] To him is ascribed the sublime confession: Credo quia

DeBalzac Honore

Honesty is for the most part less profitable than dishonesty.

DeGaulle Charles

Man is by nature a political animal.

Dead The Grateful

A sequel is an admission that you've been reduced to imitating yourself.

Dean James

Armenians and Azerbaijanis in Stepanakert, capital of the Nagorno-Karabakh autonomous region, rioted over much needed spelling reform in the Soviet Union.

Dekker Thomas

XI: If the Earth could be made to rotate twice as fast, managers would get twice as much done. If the Earth could be made to rotate twenty times as fast, everyone else would get twice as much done since all the managers would fly off. XII: I


A likely impossibility is always preferable to an unconvincing possibility.

Dennett Daniel

Time is the most valuable thing a man can spend.

Derek Bok

It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper.


Illusion is the first of all pleasures.

Descartes Rene

That's no moon...

Dewar Lord Thomas

By perseverance the snail reached the Ark.

Dewar Lord Thomas

The human race is a race of cowards; and I am not only marching in that procession but carrying a banner.

Dewar Lord Thomas Rober

No good deed goes unpunished.

Dewey John

The root of all superstition is that men observe when a thing hits, but not when it misses.

Dick Philip K.

There is no ox so dumb as the orthodox.

Dickens Charles

XLI: The more one produces, the less one gets. XLII: Simple systems are not feasible because they require infinite testing. XLIII: Hardware works best when it matters the least. XLIV: Aircraft flight in the 21st century will always be in a we

Dickens Charles

The way I understand it, the Russians are sort of a combination of evil and incompetence... sort of like the Post Office with tanks.

Dickens Charles

Gone With The Wind LITE(tm)

Dickey James

The salary of the chief executive of the large corporation is not a market award for achievement. It is frequently in the nature of a warm personal gesture by the individual to himself.

Dickson Paul

Lay off the muses, it's a very tough dollar.

Dictionary Webster's Unafraid

Too much is just enough.

Dictum Schumacher's

Fortune's Guide to Freshman Notetaking: WHEN THE PROFESSOR SAYS: YOU WRITE: Probably the greatest quality of the poetry John Milton

Diefenbaker John

We are giving instruction to FBI agents in the various Chinese dialects ... to handle present and likely future contingencies.

Dillinger John

Good government never depends upon laws, but upon the personal qualities of those who govern. The machinery of government is always subordinate to the will of those who administer that machinery. The most important element of government, therefore,


Just once I would like to persuade the audience not to wear any article of blue denim. If only they could see themselves in a pair of brown corduroys like mine instead of this awful, boring blue denim. I don't enjoy the sky or sea as much as I used

Disney Walt

Judges, as a class, display, in the matter of arranging alimony, that reckless generosity which is found only in men who are giving away someone else's cash.

Disney Walt

The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers.

Disra Benjamin

"To YOU I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition."

Disrael Benjamin

You have all the characteristics of a popular politician: a horrible voice, bad breeding, and a vulgar manner.

Disraeli Benjamin

I went into a bar feeling a little depressed, the bartender said, "What'll you have, Bud"? I said," I don't know, surprise me". So he showed me a nude picture of my wife.

Disraeli Benjamin

If your happiness depends on what somebody else does, I guess you do have a problem.

Disraeli Benjamin

Once harm has been done, even a fool understands it.

Disraeli Benjamin

We may not be able to persuade Hindus that Jesus and not Vishnu should govern their spiritual horizon, nor Moslems that Lord Buddha is at the center of their spiritual universe, nor Hebrews that Mohammed is a major prohpet, nor Christians that Shinto

Disraeli Benjamin

A morgue is a morgue is a morgue. They can paint the walls with aggressively cheerful primary colors and splashy bold graphics, but it's still a holding place for the dead until they can be parted out to organ banks. Not that I would have cared nor

Disraeli Benjamin

There is more to life than increasing its speed.

Dobbs Waldo D.R.

He jests at scars who never felt a wound.

Dobson Austin

When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to

Doctor The

No one born with a mouth and a need is "innocent".

Dogtender The Mad

Patience is the best remedy for every trouble.

Dolph Sharp

If someone had told me I would be Pope one day, I would have studied harder.

Dolph Sharp

The executioner is, I hear, very expert, and my neck is very slender.

Donald N. Smith president

When you are about to die, a wombat is better than no company at all.

Donatus Aelius

At ebb tide I wrote a line upon the sand, and gave it all my heart and all my soul. At flood tide I returned to read what I had inscribed and found my ignorance upon the shore.

Donleavy J.P.

So so is good, very good, very excellent good: and yet it is not; it is but so so.

Dooley Mr.

Nothing is more admirable than the fortitude with which millionaires tolerate the disadvantages of their wealth.

Dooley Mr.

For the fashion of Minas Tirith was such that it was built on seven levels, each delved into a hill, and about each was set a wall, and in each wall was a gate.

Dostoyevski F.

Crucifixes are sexy because there's a naked man on them.

Doug Larson

Education is the process of casting false pearls before real swine.

Douglas Lord Alfred

Plato, by the way, wanted to banish all poets from his proposed Utopia because they were liars. The truth was that Plato knew philosophers couldn't compete successfully with poets.

Douglas Norman

Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding.

Douglas Adams

A Christian is a man who feels repentance on Sunday for what he did on Saturday and is going to do on Monday.

Douglass Frederick

"The Right Honorable Gentleman is indebted to his memory for his jests and to his imagination for his facts."

Douglass Frederick

The only problem with seeing too much is that it makes you insane.

Doyle Sir Arthur Conan

[Sir Stafford Cripps] has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.

Doyle Sir Arthur Conan

For thee the wonder-working earth puts forth sweet flowers.

Doyle Sir Arthur Conan

Somehow I reached excess without ever noticing when I was passing through satisfaction.

Dr. Laurence J. Peter

Furious activity is no substitute for understanding.

Dreshfield Jerry

You get what you pay for.

Droz Gustave

What we cannot speak about we must pass over in silence.

Drucker Peter

The last thing one knows in constructing a work is what to put first.

Dudley Riggs

The greatest dangers to liberty lurk in insidious encroachment by men of zeal, well-meaning but without understanding.

Duggan B.

Once there lived a village of creatures along the bottom of a great crystal river. Each creature in its own manner clung tightly to the twigs and rocks of the river bottom, for clinging was their way of life, and resisting the current what each had

Duke Raoul

There's no justice in this world.


Mate, this parrot wouldn't VOOM if you put four million volts through it!

Dumas Alexander

Every why hath a wherefore.

Dumas Alexandre

If at first you don't succeed, you're doing about average.

Dunne Finley Peter

A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back the when it begins to rain.

Durant Will

Authors (and perhaps columnists) eventually rise to the top of whatever depths they were once able to plumb.

Durocher Leo

Littering is dumb.

Dwight Walter

Piece of cake!

Dwight Van de Vate

If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?

Dye W.H. Auden

Gay shlafen: Yiddish for "go to sleep". Now doesn't "gay shlafen" have a softer, more soothing sound than the harsh, staccato "go to sleep"? Listen to the difference: "Go to sleep, you little wretch!" ... "Gay shlafen, darling." Obvious, isn't


There can be no daily democracy without daily citizenship.

Dyke Henry Van

It's not Camelot, but it's not Cleveland, either.


Just because you like my stuff doesn't mean I owe you anything.

Dylan Bob

To be patriotic, hate all nations but your own; to be religious, all sects but your own; to be moral, all pretenses but your own.

Dylan Bob

"Every morning, I get up and look through the 'Forbes' list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work"

Dylan Bob

Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre, but they are more deadly in the long run.

Dyson Freeman

One good turn deserves another.

de Dave Johnson on

I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today.

distinctly and quite

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Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.
Hubbard Elbert

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
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