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If we see the light at the end of the tunnel, it's the light of an oncoming train.

La Rouchefoucauld


When I have one foot in the grave I will tell the truth about women. I shall tell it, jump into my coffin, pull the lid over me, and say, "Do what you like now."

Lady Whiteadder


Two wrongs are only the beginning.

Lafferty R. A.


It is sweet to let the mind unbend on occasion.

Lai Chou En


At ebb tide I wrote a line upon the sand, and gave it all my heart and all my soul. At flood tide I returned to read what I had inscribed and found my ignorance upon the shore.

Lampoon The Harvard


To generalize is to be an idiot.

Landers Ann


The first Rotarian was the first man to call John the Baptist "Jack."

Lang Andrew


A woman employs sincerity only when every other form of deception has failed.

Langan L.M.


Some men are heterosexual, and some are bisexual, and some men don't think about sex at all... they become lawyers.

Lao Tsu


When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

Lara Michael


The man who runs may fight again.

Lara Michael


Good government never depends upon laws, but upon the personal qualities of those who govern. The machinery of government is always subordinate to the will of those who administer that machinery. The most important element of government, therefore,

Lardner David


Small is beautiful.

Lardner Ring


The final delusion is the belief that one has lost all delusions.

Lardner Ring


IF I HAD A MINE SHAFT, I don't think I would just abandon it. There's got to be a better way.

Larry Niven


When you die, you lose a very important part of your life.

Larsen Dalglish


"Life is too important to take seriously."

Larson Erik


All of the true things I am about to tell you are shameless lies.

Lascl Christopher


I hate dying.

Laukikanyay.


Two heads are better than one.

Lazarus


No evil can happen to a good man.

Lazarus Long


were found to be wearing neckwear that was tighter than their neck circumference. The visual discrimination of the 22 subjects was evaluated using a critical flicker frequency (CFF) test. Results of the CFF test indicated that tight neckwear signifi

LeBoutillier J.


God help those who do not help themselves.

LeGuin Ursula K.


Haste makes waste.

Lear King


Most general statements are false, including this one.

Leary Tim


This is the sort of English up with which I will not put.

Lebowitz Fran


What we cannot speak about we must pass over in silence.

Lebowitz Fran


A man gazing at the stars is proverbially at the mercy of the puddles in the road.

Lebowitz Fran


An office party is not, as is sometimes supposed the Managing Director's chance to kiss the tea-girl. It is the tea-girl's chance to kiss the Managing Director (however bizarre an ambition this may seem to anyone who has seen the Managing Director f

Lebowitz Fran


A beginning is the time for taking the most delicate care that balances are correct.

Leghorn Foghorn


As Gen. de Gaulle occassionally acknowledges America to be the daughter of Europe, so I am pleased to come to Yale, the daughter of Harvard.

Leghorn Foghorn


Men's skin is different from women's skin. It is usually bigger, and it has more snakes tattooed on it. Also, if you examine a woman's skin very closely, inch by inch, starting at her shapely ankles, then gently tracing the slender curve of her cal

Leghorn Foghorn


I'll turn over a new leaf.

Lehman John


A man who cannot seduce men cannot save them either.

Lehrer Tom


Let's say your wedding ring falls into your toaster, and when you stick your hand in to retrieve it, you suffer Pain and Suffering as well as Mental Anguish. You would sue: * The toaster manufacturer, for failure to include, in the instructions

Lehrer Tom


If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?

Lehrer Tom


I have ways of making money that you know nothing of.

Lem Stanislaw


XXVI: If a sufficient number of management layers are superimposed on each other, it can be assured that disaster is not left to chance. XXVII: Rank does not intimidate hardware. Neither does the lack of rank. XXVIII: It is better to be the r

Lem Stanislaw


[District Attorneys] learn in District Attorney School that there are two sure-fire ways to get a lot of favorable publicity: (1) Go down and raid all the lockers in the local high school and confiscate 53 marijuana cigarettes and put them in a

Len Cool


Sic transit gloria mundi. [So passes away the glory of this world.]

Lenin Vladimir Il'ich


Perhaps the remembrance of these things will prove a source of future pleasure.

Lenin


Philosophy will clip an angel's wings.

Lennon John


Mankind is poised midway between the gods and the beasts.

Lennon John


Before you ask more questions, think about whether you really want to know the answers.

Leo Rosten


There is nothing new except what has been forgotten.

LeoGrande William


I didn't believe in reincarnation in any of my other lives. I don't see why I should have to believe in it in this one.

Leonard Ohio Lt. Governor Paul


Never invest your money in anything that eats or needs repainting.

Leopardi Giacomo


There's no such thing as an original sin.

Lerner Max


Prediction is very difficult, especially of the future.

Leslie Stephen


Knowledge is power.

Leslie Stephen


Where it is a duty to worship the sun it is pretty sure to be a crime to examine the laws of heat.

Lester Julius


Progress was all right. Only it went on too long.

Letterman David


The farther you go, the less you know.

Letterman David


Words have a longer life than deeds.

Letterman David


My father, a good man, told me, "Never lose your ignorance; you cannot replace it."

Letterman David


Mirrors should reflect a little before throwing back images.

Letterman David


Indeed, the first noble truth of Buddhism, usually translated as `all life is suffering,' is more accurately rendered `life is filled with a sense of pervasive unsatisfactoriness.'

Letterman David


Exceptions prove the rule, and wreck the budget.

Letterman David


Absolutum obsoletum. (If it works, it's out of date.)

Letterman David


Luck, that's when preparation and opportunity meet.

Levant Oscar


Whatever it is, I fear Greeks even when they bring gifts.

Levant Oscar


She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

Levin Bernard


Why be a man when you can be a success?

Levine Joseph E.


Being a miner, as soon as you're too old and tired and sick and stupid to do your job properly, you have to go, where the very opposite applies with the judges.

Levinson Leonard


Writing about music is like dancing about architecture.

Lew Sinclair


The road to Hades is easy to travel.

Lewin Ralph


"You mean, if you allow the master to be uncivil, to treat you any old way he likes, and to insult your dignity, then he may deem you fit to hear his view of things?" "Quite the contrary. You must defend your integrity, assuming you have integrit

Lewis C.S.


There are ten or twenty basic truths, and life is the process of discovering them over and over and over.

Lewis C.S.


A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.

Lewis Joe E.


Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, then names the streets after them.

Lewis Joe E.


I have seen the future and it is just like the present, only longer.

Lewis Richard


Ninety percent of the time things turn out worse than you thought they would. The other ten percent of the time you had no right to expect that much.

Lewis Sinclair


Never buy what you do not want because it is cheap; it will be dear to you.

Lewis Thomas


Any road followed to its end leads precisely nowhere. Climb the mountain just a little to test it's a mountain. From the top of the mountain, you cannot see the mountain.

Li Woman's


The only alliance I would make with the Women's Liberation Movement is in bed.

Li Mark Twain


"There was an interesting development in the CBS-Westmoreland trial: both sides agreed that after the trial, Andy Rooney would be allowed to talk to the jury for three minutes about little things that annoyed him during the trial."

Lie Trygve


"We maintain that the very foundation of our way of life is what we call free enterprise," said Cash McCall, "but when one of our citizens show enough free enterprise to pile up a little of that profit, we do our best to make him feel that he ought t

Liebling A.J.


A dream will always triumph over reality, once it is given the chance.

Liebling A.J.


Sometimes, too long is too long.

Liepmann Hans


I just need enough to tide me over until I need more.

Lieutenant Kermit Tyler


It is annoying to be honest to no purpose.

Lilly John


"I gained nothing at all from Supreme Enlightenment, and for that very reason it is called Supreme Enlightenment."

Lincoln A.


If we could sell our experiences for what they cost us, we would all be millionaires.

Lincoln Abraham


An older student came to Otis and said, "I have been to see a great number of teachers and I have given up a great number of pleasures. I have fasted, been celibate and stayed awake nights seeking enlightenment. I have given up everything I was aske

Lincoln Abraham


Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it.

Lincoln Abraham


Instead of loving your enemies, treat your friends a little better.

Lincoln Abraham


Fortune Documents the Great Legal Decisions: We think that we may take judicial notice of the fact that the term "bitch" may imply some feeling of endearment when applied to a female of the canine species but that it is seldom, if ever, so used whe

Lincoln Abraham


Two can Live as Cheaply as One for Half as Long.

Lincoln Abraham


Non-Determinism is not meant to be reasonable.

Lincoln Abraham


A place for everything and everything in its place.

Lincoln Abraham


Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest r

Lindbergh Charles


Life is like a 10 speed bicycle. Most of us have gears we never use.

Ling James J.


Here's to women. Would that we could fall into her arms without falling into her hands.

Lippmann Walter


I was in this prematurely air conditioned supermarket and there were all these aisles and there were these bathing caps you could buy that had these kind of Fourth of July plumes on them that were red and yellow and blue and I wasn't tempted to buy

Lippmann Walter


If you only have a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail.

Little Mary Wilson


If a jury in a criminal trial stays out for more than twenty-four hours, it is certain to vote acquittal, save in those instances where it votes guilty.

Little Rich


The tree in which the sap is stagnant remains fruitless.

Lloyd Kaufman


"Necessity is the mother of invention" is a silly proverb. "Necessity is the mother of futile dodges" is much nearer the truth.

Lo graffito in


The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it.

Locke John


I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or whether I am now a butterfly dreaming I am a man.

Lockridge Ross


I need another lawyer like I need another hole in my head.

Long Lazarus


The coast was clear.

Long Lazarus


If a man loses his reverence for any part of life, he will lose his reverence for all of life.

Long Lazarus


"The chain which can be yanked is not the eternal chain."

Long Lazarus


Moneyliness is next to Godliness.

Long Lazarus


So little time, so little to do.

Long Lazarus


If there were a school for, say, sheet metal workers, that after three years left its graduates as unprepared for their careers as does law school, it would be closed down in a minute, and no doubt by lawyers.

Long Lazarus


Innovation is hard to schedule.

Long Lazarus


Would ye both eat your cake and have your cake?

Long Lazarus


If little green men land in your back yard, hide any little green women you've got in the house.

Long Lazarus


Faith is under the left nipple.

Long Russell


God helps them that help themselves.

Longfellow H.W.


I'm always looking for a new idea that will be more productive than its cost.

Longworth A. R.


If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Longworth Alice Roosevelt


God was satisfied with his own work, and that is fatal.

Longworth Alice Roosevelt


With women, I've got a long bamboo pole with a leather loop on the end of it. I slip the loop around their necks so they can't get away or come too close. Like catching snakes.

Longworth Alice Roosevelt


Everything is possible. Pass the word.

Loo Lewis Carroll


Fortune and love befriend the bold.

Louder P.G


Sensible and responsible women do not want to vote.

Louder P.G.


If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.

Louder P.G. Wodehouse


It is Mr. Mellon's credo that $200,000,000 can do no wrong. Our offense consists in doubting it.

Louisi Edwin Edwards


Practical people would be more practical if they would take a little more time for dreaming.

Lowell James Russell


It is your concern when your neighbor's wall is on fire.

Lowell Robert


It is through symbols that man consciously or unconsciously lives, works and has his being.

Lowell James Russell


"Given the choice between accomplishing something and just lying around, I'd rather lie around. No contest."

Lubbock John


But the greatest Electrical Pioneer of them all was Thomas Edison, who was a brilliant inventor despite the fact that he had little formal education and lived in New Jersey. Edison's first major invention in 1877, was the phonograph, which could soo

Luce C.B.


A likely impossibility is always preferable to an unconvincing possibility.

Luce Clare Booth


"I only touch base with reality on an as-needed basis!"

Lucinda Childs


Marijuana will be legal some day, because the many law students who now smoke pot will someday become congressmen and legalize it in order to protect themselves.

Lula Pace Ripley


The only thing that experience teaches us is that experience teaches us nothing.

Lumsden Marshall


per year.

Lur Terry Pratchett


Judges, as a class, display, in the matter of arranging alimony, that reckless generosity which is found only in men who are giving away someone else's cash.

Lustbader Eric Van


God instructs the heart, not by ideas, but by pains and contradictions.

Luten Daniel B.


Take care of the luxuries and the necessities will take care of themselves.

Luten Daniel B.


A woman takes off her claim to respect along with her garments.

Luther Martin


In the olden days in England, you could be hung for stealing a sheep or a loaf of bread. However, if a sheep stole a loaf of bread and gave it to you, you would only be tried for receiving, a crime punishable by forty lashes with the cat or the dog,

Luther Martin


It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something.

Luther Martin


Facts, apart from their relationships, are like labels on empty bottles.

Lyly John


"You can't survive by sucking the juice from a wet mitten."

Lynch


"The jig's up, Elman." "Which jig?"

lose. until you





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He that is giddy thinks the world turns round.
Shakespeare

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