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"Consequences, Schmonsequences, as long as I'm rich."

P Harry Thurston

An atom-blaster is a good weapon, but it can point both ways.

Pa Long Chen

Rotten wood cannot be carved.

Pa Jessie

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

Paar Jack

It's easier to take it apart than to put it back together.

Paar Jack

Ignorance is the Mother of Devotion.

Paine Thomas

Do not use that foreign word "ideals". We have that excellent native word "lies".

Paine Thomas

Nothing matters very much, and few things matter at all.

Palindromist The Mad

A woman who is guided by the head and not by the heart is a social pestilence: she has all the defects of the passionate and affectionate woman, with none of her compensations; she is without pity, without love, without virtue, without sex.

Parker Dorothy

It is ridiculous to call this an industry. This is not. This is rat eat rat, dog eat dog. I'll kill 'em, and I'm going to kill 'em before they kill me. You're talking about the American way of survival of the fittest.

Parker Dorothy

If God is One, what is bad?

Parker Dorothy

"Every morning, I get up and look through the 'Forbes' list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work"

Parker Dorothy

... Our second completely true news item was sent to me by Mr. H. Boyce Connell Jr. of Atlanta, Ga., where he is involved in a law firm. One thing I like about the South is, folks there care about tradition. If somebody gets handed a name like "H.

Parker Dorothy

Illusion is the first of all pleasures.

Parker Dorothy

One man's Mede is another man's Persian.

Parker Dorthy

In the long run we are all dead.

Parker Robert

After the game the king and the pawn go in the same box.


Death is a spirit leaving a body, sort of like a shell leaving the nut behind.

Parkinson C.N.

The state of innocence contains the germs of all future sin.

Parkinson C.N.

The chief cause of problems is solutions.

Parnas Dave

Pereant, inquit, qui ante nos nostra dixerunt. [Confound those who have said our remarks before us.] or [May they perish who have expressed our bright ideas before us.]

Pascal Blaise

It is bad luck to be superstitious.

Pascal Blaise

Life sucks, but death doesn't put out at all.

Pascal Blaise

With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law; and every time they make a law it's a joke.

Pasteur L.

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats.

Pat Cadigan

Goals... Plans... they're fantasies, they're part of a dream world...

Pat Cadigan

The individual choice of garnishment of a burger can be an important point to the consumer in this day when individualism is an increasingly important thing to people.

Patricia O Tuama

If men are not afraid to die, it is of no avail to threaten them with death. If men live in constant fear of dying, And if breaking the law means a man will be killed, Who will dare to break the law? There is always an official executioner. If

Patrick Saint

"I'm dying," he croaked. "My experiment was a success," the chemist retorted . "You can't really train a beagle," he dogmatized. "That's no beagle, it's a mongrel," she muttered. "The fire is going out," he bellowed. "Bad marksmanship," the h


Beauty is one of the rare things which does not lead to doubt of God.

Paul Erdman

Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women it is merely a good excuse not to play football.

Paul Tillich German

In the olden days in England, you could be hung for stealing a sheep or a loaf of bread. However, if a sheep stole a loaf of bread and gave it to you, you would only be tried for receiving, a crime punishable by forty lashes with the cat or the dog,

Pelt Lucy Van

One man's brain plus one other will produce one half as many ideas as one man would have produced alone. These two plus two more will produce half again as many ideas. These four plus four more begin to represent a creative meeting, and the ratio c

Penn Jillette

A dream will always triumph over reality, once it is given the chance.

Penn William

There has been a little distress selling on the stock exchange.

Perce Chief Joseph

I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today.

Perelman S.J.

If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers.


The tree in which the sap is stagnant remains fruitless.

Perlis Alan J.

If a fool persists in his folly he shall become wise.

Peter Dr. Laurence J.

Now, you might ask, "How do I get one of those complete home tool sets for under $4?" An excellent question. Go to one of those really cheap discount stores where they sell plastic furniture in colors visible from the planet Neptune and where they

Peter Dr. Laurence J.

The Least Successful Equal Pay Advertisement In 1976 the European Economic Community pointed out to the Irish Government that it had not yet implemented the agreed sex equality legislation. The Dublin Government immediately advertised for an equal

Peter Irene

Good government never depends upon laws, but upon the personal qualities of those who govern. The machinery of government is always subordinate to the will of those who administer that machinery. The most important element of government, therefore,

Peter Laurence

A little inaccuracy sometimes saves tons of explanation.

Peter Laurence J.

"Cogito ergo I'm right and you're wrong."

Peter Laurence J.

All is well that ends well.

Peter Stack

If a guru falls in the forest with no one to hear him, was he really a guru at all?

Peter Straub

It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end.

Petronius Gaius

Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm.


Most general statements are false, including this one.


A society in which women are taught anything but the management of a family, the care of men, and the creation of the future generation is a society which is on its way out.


One hundred women are not worth a single testicle.

Philip Hale Boston

Only that in you which is me can hear what I'm saying.

Philips Emo

Money doesn't talk, it swears.

Phillips Emo

Intellect annuls Fate. So far as a man thinks, he is free.

Phillips Utah

Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality.

Physicist John von Neumann

Nothing succeeds like success.


The trouble with opportunity is that it always comes disguised as hard work.


[District Attorneys] learn in District Attorney School that there are two sure-fire ways to get a lot of favorable publicity: (1) Go down and raid all the lockers in the local high school and confiscate 53 marijuana cigarettes and put them in a

Picasso Pablo

You can't run away forever, But there's nothing wrong with getting a good head start.

Pike Bishop James

A woman's a woman until the day she dies, but a man's only a man as long as he can.

Pile Stephen

If I could reach, I'd never leave the house.

Pile Stephen

There's nothing worse for your business than extra Santa Clauses smoking in the men's room.

Pile Stephen

The great question that has never been answered and which I have not yet been able to answer despite my thirty years of research into the feminine soul is: WHAT DOES A WOMAN WANT?

Pile Stephen

The Poems, all three hundred of them, may be summed up in one of their phrases: "Let our thoughts be correct".

Pile Stephen

If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?


I remember when legal used to mean lawful, now it means some kind of loophole.


Please try to limit the amount of "this room doesn't have any bazingas" until you are told that those rooms are "punched out." Once punched out, we have a right to complain about atrocities, missing bazingas, and such.

Pinero Sir Arthur Wing

The Least Successful Equal Pay Advertisement In 1976 the European Economic Community pointed out to the Irish Government that it had not yet implemented the agreed sex equality legislation. The Dublin Government immediately advertised for an equal

Pintauro Joseph

A man who cannot seduce men cannot save them either.

Pirsig Robert

In "King Henry VI, Part II," Shakespeare has Dick Butcher suggest to his fellow anti-establishment rabble-rousers, "The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers." That action may be extreme but a similar sentiment was expressed by Thomas K. Co

Platford Lois

Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.


Non-Determinism is not meant to be reasonable.


A lie is an abomination unto the Lord and a very present help in time of trouble.


A witty saying proves nothing.


Praise the sea; on shore remain.


Good government never depends upon laws, but upon the personal qualities of those who govern. The machinery of government is always subordinate to the will of those who administer that machinery. The most important element of government, therefore,


"We're not talking about the same thing," he said. "For you the world is weird because if you're not bored with it you're at odds with it. For me the world is weird because it is stupendous, awesome, mysterious, unfathomable; my interest has been to

Plautus Titus Maccius

One good turn asketh another.

Plautus Titus Maccius

VI: A hungry dog hunts best. A hungrier dog hunts even better. VII: Decreased business base increases overhead. So does increased business base. VIII: The most unsuccessful four years in the education of a cost-estimator is fifth grade ari

Plautus Titus Maccius

Never appeal to a man's "better nature." He may not have one. Invoking his self-interest gives you more leverage.

Player Willis

Don't guess


Believe everything you hear about the world; nothing is too impossibly bad.

Plummer Christopher

Here's to women. Would that we could fall into her arms without falling into her hands.


The meek shall inherit the earth, but *not* its mineral rights.

Pollard John G.

Never look a gift horse in the mouth.


Every man who has reached even his intellectual teens begins to suspect that life is no farce; that it is not genteel comedy even; that it flowers and fructifies on the contrary out of the profoundest tragic depths of the essential death in which its


Think sideways!

Pope Alexander

"I only touch base with reality on an as-needed basis!"

Pope Alexander

I have seen the future and it is just like the present, only longer.

Pope John Paul

Any road followed to its end leads precisely nowhere. Climb the mountain just a little to test it's a mountain. From the top of the mountain, you cannot see the mountain.

Pope St. Gregory

As well look for a needle in a bottle of hay.

Poppins Mary

"We maintain that the very foundation of our way of life is what we call free enterprise," said Cash McCall, "but when one of our citizens show enough free enterprise to pile up a little of that profit, we do our best to make him feel that he ought t

Postmas James

Drop the vase and it will become a Ming of the past.

Pournelle Niven and

According to my best recollection, I don't remember.

Powers Richard

The best you get is an even break.

Prabhupada Swami

No is no negative in a woman's mouth.

Prentice George D.

Look ere ye leap.

President Pat Paulsen for

I value kindness to human beings first of all, and kindness to animals. I don't respect the law; I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper, and old men

Presley Elvis

You can't expect a boy to be vicious till he's been to a good school.

Presley Elvis

The ideal voice for radio may be defined as showing no substance, no sex, no owner, and a message of importance for every housewife.

Price Don

The world is your exercise-book, the pages on which you do your sums. It is not reality, although you can express reality there if you wish. You are also free to write nonsense, or lies, or to tear the pages.

Prochnow Herbert

Crito, I owe a cock to Asclepius; will you remember to pay the debt?

Prochnow Herbert V.

... but as records of courts and justice are admissible, it can easily be proved that powerful and malevolent magicians once existed and were a scourge to mankind. The evidence (including confession) upon which certain women were convicted of witch

Professor English

It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle if it is lightly greased.

Prosser D. Winkel and F.

The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it.


We have lingered long enough on the shores of the Cosmic Ocean.

Proust M.

You k'n hide de fier, but w'at you gwine do wid de smoke?

Proverb A Yippie

Work Hard. Rock Hard. Eat Hard. Sleep Hard. Grow Big. Wear Glasses If You Need 'Em.

Proverb Ancient Simian

Knowledge is power.

Proverb Chinese

I need another lawyer like I need another hole in my head.

Proverb Chinese

It's very glamorous to raise millions of dollars, until it's time for the venture capitalist to suck your eyeballs out.

Proverb Recent Chinese

In charity there is no excess.

Pryne Hester

Ask not for whom the Bell tolls, and you will pay only the station-to-station rate.


Long were the days of pain I have spent within its walls, and long were the nights of aloneness; and who can depart from his pain and his aloneness without regret?


Mankind is poised midway between the gods and the beasts.

Publius Ovidius Naso

"You would do well not to imagine profundity," he said. "Anything that seems of momentous occasion should be dwelt upon as though it were of slight note. Conversely, trivialities must be attended to with the greatest of care. Because death is moment

Publius Terentius Afer

Let's say your wedding ring falls into your toaster, and when you stick your hand in to retrieve it, you suffer Pain and Suffering as well as Mental Anguish. You would sue: * The toaster manufacturer, for failure to include, in the instructions

Publius Terentius Afer

If a thing's worth doing, it is worth doing badly.

Publius Terentius Afer

Many hands make light work.

Publius Terentius Afer

If you want divine justice, die.

Publius Vergilius Maro

Once the toothpaste is out of the tube, it's hard to get it back in.

Publius Vergilius Maro

To every Ph.D. there is an equal and opposite Ph.D.

Publius Vergilius Maro

When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.

Publius Vergilius Maro

It is when I struggle to be brief that I become obscure.

Pudd'nhead Wilson's

If we see the light at the end of the tunnel, it's the light of an oncoming train.

Pulitzer Joseph

The superior man understands what is right; the inferior man understands what will sell.

Pusey Nathan

The only reward of virtue is virtue.


There is no cure for birth and death other than to enjoy the interval.

Python Monty

Laws are like sausages. It's better not to see them being made.

prayer Medieval

The philosopher's treatment of a question is like the treatment of an illness.

proverb Arab

He who makes a beast of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man.

proverb Arabian

[Maturity consists in the discovery that] there comes a critical moment where everything is reversed, after which the point becomes to understand more and more that there is something which cannot be understood.

proverb Chinese

A beginning is the time for taking the most delicate care that balances are correct.

proverb Chinese

Don't steal; thou'lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.

proverb Chinese

No one born with a mouth and a need is "innocent".

proverb Chinese

Lots of folks confuse bad management with destiny.

proverb Chinese

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

proverb Chinese

Truth never comes into the world but like a bastard, to the ignominy of him that brought her birth.

proverb Chinese

The coast was clear.

proverb Indian

America, I'm putting my queer shoulder to the wheel.

proverb Italian

We're all in this alone.

proverb Polish

He who despairs over an event is a coward, but he who holds hopes for the human condition is a fool.

proverb Spanish

If you sell diamonds, you cannot expect to have many customers. But a diamond is a diamond even if there are no customers.

proverb Turkish

Indeed, the first noble truth of Buddhism, usually translated as `all life is suffering,' is more accurately rendered `life is filled with a sense of pervasive unsatisfactoriness.'

proverb. Scottish

Random Quote

A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won't cross the street to vote in a national election.
Vaughan Bill

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
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