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The bone-chilling scream split the warm summer night in two, the first half being before the scream when it was fairly balmy and calm and pleasant, the second half still balmy and quite pleasant for those who hadn't heard the scream at all, but not c

P Harry Thurston

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

Pa Long Chen

Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, then names the streets after them.

Pa Jessie

If you are a fatalist, what can you do about it?

Paar Jack

[District Attorneys] learn in District Attorney School that there are two sure-fire ways to get a lot of favorable publicity: (1) Go down and raid all the lockers in the local high school and confiscate 53 marijuana cigarettes and put them in a

Paar Jack

Odets, where is thy sting?

Paine Thomas

You can't learn too soon that the most useful thing about a principle is that it can always be sacrificed to expediency.

Paine Thomas

An honest politician is one who when he is bought will stay bought.

Palindromist The Mad

Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely been detected.

Parker Dorothy

You or I must yield up his life to Ahrimanes. I would rather it were you. I should have no hesitation in sacrificing my own life to spare yours, but we take stock next week, and it would not be fair on the company.

Parker Dorothy

Tom Hayden is the kind of politician who gives opportunism a bad name.

Parker Dorothy

The public is an old woman. Let her maunder and mumble.

Parker Dorothy

I do not believe in the creed professed by the Jewish Church, by the Roman Church, by the Greek Church, by the Turkish Church, by the Protestant Church, nor by any Church that I know of. My own mind is my own Church.

Parker Dorothy

I often quote myself; it adds spice to my conversation.

Parker Dorothy

The rule is, jam to-morrow and jam yesterday, but never jam today.

Parker Dorthy

Our policy is, when in doubt, do the right thing.

Parker Robert

No one regards what is before his feet; we all gaze at the stars.


The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.

Parkinson C.N.

Rome was not built in one day.

Parkinson C.N.

If the Nazis had television with satellite technology, we'd all be goose-stepping. Americans are just as suggestible.

Parnas Dave

Like, if I'm not for me, then fer shure, like who will be? And if, y'know, if I'm not like fer anyone else, then hey, I mean, what am I? And if not now, like I dunno, maybe like when? And if not Who, then I dunno, maybe like the Rolling Stones?

Pascal Blaise

The Worst Prison Guards The largest number of convicts ever to escape simultaneously from a maximum security prison is 124. This record is held by Alcoente Prison, near Lisbon in Portugal. During the weeks leading up to the escape in July 1978 th

Pascal Blaise

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car.

Pascal Blaise

Everywhere I go I'm asked if I think the university stifles writers. My opinion is that they don't stifle enough of them. There's many a bestseller that could have been prevented by a good teacher.

Pasteur L.

Wishing without work is like fishing without bait.

Pat Cadigan

Liberty is always dangerous, but it is the safest thing we have.

Pat Cadigan

Plus ,ca change, plus c'est la m^eme chose. [The more things change, the more they remain the same.]

Patricia O Tuama

I have often looked at women and committed adultery in my heart.

Patrick Saint

For myself, I can only say that I am astonished and somewhat terrified at the results of this evening's experiments. Astonished at the wonderful power you have developed, and terrified at the thought that so much hideous and bad music may be put on


Confession is good for the soul only in the sense that a tweed coat is good for dandruff.

Paul Erdman

The so-called lessons of history are for the most part the rationalizations of the victors. History is written by the survivors.

Paul Tillich German

What a bonanza! An unknown beginner to be directed by Lubitsch, in a script by Wilder and Brackett, and to play with Paramount's two superstars, Gary Cooper and Claudette Colbert, and to be beaten up by both of them!

Pelt Lucy Van

A memorandum is written not to inform the reader, but to protect the writer.

Penn Jillette

Small things make base men proud.

Penn William

Relations are simply a tedious pack of people, who haven't the remotest knowledge of how to live, nor the smallest instinct about when to die.

Perce Chief Joseph

That must be wonderful: I don't understand it at all.

Perelman S.J.

Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines.


Nothing is illegal if one hundred businessmen decide to do it.

Perlis Alan J.

Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition.

Peter Dr. Laurence J.

I have discovered that all human evil comes from this, man's being unable to sit still in a room.

Peter Dr. Laurence J.

The more I want to get something done, the less I call it work.

Peter Irene

Millions of sensible people are too high-minded to concede that politics is almost always the choice of the lesser evil. "Tweedledum and Tweedledee," they say. "I will not vote." Having abstained, they are presented with a President who appoints t

Peter Laurence

The heroic hours of life do not announce their presence by drum and trumpet, challenging us to be true to ourselves by appeals to the martial spirit that keeps the blood at heat. Some little, unassuming, unobtrusive choice presents itself before us

Peter Laurence J.

Sic transit gloria mundi. [So passes away the glory of this world.]

Peter Laurence J.

Another such victory over the Romans, and we are undone.

Peter Stack

Let him choose out of my files, his projects to accomplish.

Peter Straub

If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.

Petronius Gaius

Your wig steers the gig.


Nothing shortens a journey so pleasantly as an account of misfortunes at which the hearer is permitted to laugh.


You'd best be snoozin', 'cause you don't be gettin' no work done at 5 a.m. anyway.


Like ya know? Rock 'N Roll is an esoteric language that unlocks the creativity chambers in people's brains, and like totally activates their essential hipness, which of course is like totally necessary for saving the earth, like because the first th

Philip Hale Boston

In this world there are only two tragedies. One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.

Philips Emo

The Hollywood tradition I like best is called "sucking up to the stars."

Phillips Emo

The avocation of assessing the failures of better men can be turned into a comfortable livelihood, providing you back it up with a Ph.D.

Phillips Utah

It is often the case that the man who can't tell a lie thinks he is the best judge of one.

Physicist John von Neumann

"They make a desert and call it peace."


Good advice is something a man gives when he is too old to set a bad example.


To defend the Saigon regime is not worth one more human life.

Picasso Pablo

A casual stroll through a lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything.

Pike Bishop James

Some people say a front-engine car handles best. Some people say a rear-engine car handles best. I say a rented car handles best.

Pile Stephen

A public debt is a kind of anchor in the storm; but if the anchor be too heavy for the vessel, she will be sunk by that very weight which was intended for her preservation.

Pile Stephen

He jests at scars who never felt a wound.

Pile Stephen

If a jury in a criminal trial stays out for more than twenty-four hours, it is certain to vote acquittal, save in those instances where it votes guilty.

Pile Stephen

You have all eternity to be cautious in when you're dead.

Pile Stephen

A man gazing at the stars is proverbially at the mercy of the puddles in the road.


The sunlights differ, but there is only one darkness.


Would it help if I got out and pushed?

Pinero Sir Arthur Wing

An actor's a guy who if you ain't talkin' about him, ain't listening.

Pintauro Joseph

I never deny, I never contradict. I sometimes forget.

Pirsig Robert

I always had a repulsive need to be something more than human.

Platford Lois

A sequel is an admission that you've been reduced to imitating yourself.


There's nothing to writing. All you do is sit at a typewriter and open a vein.


Canada Post doesn't really charge 32 cents for a stamp. It's 2 cents for postage and 30 cents for storage.


What a strange game. The only winning move is not to play.


Corrupt, stupid grasping functionaries will make at least as big a muddle of socialism as stupid, selfish and acquisitive employers can make of capitalism.


Age before beauty; and pearls before swine.


Fast ship? You mean you've never heard of the Millennium Falcon?

Plautus Titus Maccius

And ever has it been known that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.

Plautus Titus Maccius

Hating the Yankees is as American as pizza pie, unwed mothers and cheating on your income tax.

Plautus Titus Maccius

Don't put too fine a point to your wit for fear it should get blunted.

Player Willis

You can fool all the people all of the time if the advertising is right and the budget is big enough.


'Scuse me, while I kiss the sky!

Plummer Christopher

Some men are heterosexual, and some are bisexual, and some men don't think about sex at all... they become lawyers.


Let others praise ancient times; I am glad I was born in these.

Pollard John G.

Man is the measure of all things.


My mind can never know my body, although it has become quite friendly with my legs.


Things are more like they are today than they ever were before.

Pope Alexander

Practice yourself what you preach.

Pope Alexander

Mandrell: "You know what I think?" Doctor: "Ah, ah that's a catch question. With a brain your size you don't think, right?"

Pope John Paul

If the path be beautiful, let us not ask where it leads.

Pope St. Gregory

In my end is my beginning.

Poppins Mary

When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President. Now I'm beginning to believe it.

Postmas James

The man who runs may fight again.

Pournelle Niven and

When I hear a man applauded by the mob I always feel a pang of pity for him. All he has to do to be hissed is to live long enough.

Powers Richard

Success is in the minds of Fools.

Prabhupada Swami

Death is a spirit leaving a body, sort of like a shell leaving the nut behind.

Prentice George D.

Have the courage to take your own thoughts seriously, for they will shape you.

President Pat Paulsen for

There can be no daily democracy without daily citizenship.

Presley Elvis

There is only one word for aid that is genuinely without strings, and that word is blackmail.

Presley Elvis

A good scapegoat is hard to find. A guilty conscience is the mother of invention.

Price Don

The liberals can understand everything but people who don't understand them.

Prochnow Herbert

An older student came to Otis and said, "I have been to see a great number of teachers and I have given up a great number of pleasures. I have fasted, been celibate and stayed awake nights seeking enlightenment. I have given up everything I was aske

Prochnow Herbert V.

It is now 10 p.m. Do you know where Henry Kissinger is?

Professor English

Those who have some means think that the most important thing in the world is love. The poor know that it is money.

Prosser D. Winkel and F.

By perseverance the snail reached the Ark.


Learning without thought is labor lost; thought without learning is perilous.

Proust M.

A great empire, like a great cake, is most easily diminished at the edges.

Proverb A Yippie

Aim for the moon. If you miss, you may hit a star.

Proverb Ancient Simian

Why am I so soft in the middle when the rest of my life is so hard?

Proverb Chinese

Doctors and lawyers must go to school for years and years, often with little sleep and with great sacrifice to their first wives.

Proverb Chinese

A straw vote only shows which way the hot air blows.

Proverb Recent Chinese

In case of fire, stand in the hall and shout "Fire!"

Pryne Hester

It is so stupid of modern civilisation to have given up believing in the devil when he is the only explanation of it.


Facts are the enemy of truth.


He thinks the Gettysburg Address is where Lincoln lived.

Publius Ovidius Naso

What I tell you three times is true.

Publius Terentius Afer

The good Christian should beware of mathematicians and all those who make empty prophecies. The danger already exists that mathematicians have made a covenant with the devil to darken the spirit and confine man in the bonds of Hell.

Publius Terentius Afer

No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.

Publius Terentius Afer

A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject.

Publius Terentius Afer

The world's great men have not commonly been great scholars, nor its great scholars great men.

Publius Vergilius Maro

I would like to electrocute everyone who uses the word 'fair' in connection with income tax policies.

Publius Vergilius Maro

The day will come when the mystical generation of Jesus, by the Supreme Being as his Father, in the womb of a virgin will be classified with the fable of the generation of Minerva in the brain of Jupiter. But we may hope that the dawn of reason and

Publius Vergilius Maro

Classical music is the kind we keep thinking will turn into a tune.

Publius Vergilius Maro

If reporters don't know that truth is plural, they ought to be lawyers.

Pudd'nhead Wilson's

I might have gone to West Point, but I was too proud to speak to a congressman.

Pulitzer Joseph

Life is the living you do, Death is the living you don't do.

Pusey Nathan

Sometimes, at the end of the day, when I'm smiling and shaking their hands, I want to kick them.


A good name lost is seldom regained. When character is gone, all is gone, and one of the richest jewels of life is lost forever.

Python Monty

Home is where the hurt is.

prayer Medieval

Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.

proverb Arab

Justice always prevails ... three times out of seven!

proverb Arabian

Having the fewest wants, I am nearest to the gods.

proverb Chinese

Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment.

proverb Chinese

Don't get mad, get even.

proverb Chinese

Judges, as a class, display, in the matter of arranging alimony, that reckless generosity which is found only in men who are giving away someone else's cash.

proverb Chinese

What good is an obscenity trial except to popularize literature?

proverb Chinese

If there were a school for, say, sheet metal workers, that after three years left its graduates as unprepared for their careers as does law school, it would be closed down in a minute, and no doubt by lawyers.

proverb Chinese

The only "ism" Hollywood believes in is plagiarism.

proverb Chinese

To add insult to injury.

proverb Indian

You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist.

proverb Italian

To know Edina is to reject it.

proverb Polish

In the Spring, I have counted 136 different kinds of weather inside of 24 hours.

proverb Spanish

The first Rotarian was the first man to call John the Baptist "Jack."

proverb Turkish

He who makes a beast of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man.

proverb. Scottish

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New York now leads the world's great cities in the number of people around whom you shouldn't make a sudden move.
Letterman David

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